Basics of Messiantic Shmoodelism

BASICS OF MESSIANTIC SHMOODELISM

Yeshmuah IS MESHUGAH AND Lord Roscoe
Messiantic Shmoodelism started with Yeshmuah (Joozis of Milpitas) as His Shmooish followers accepted the evidence that He was the promised Meshugah (Kewl One) of Slobovia, and as the shripchahs foretold, fivetold even, He also was the Meshugah of Slobovia on the Flush. The Great God MOTA who made the Universe with his BIG BANG MACHINE sent us The Lord Roscoe, THREEE TIMES, who died for sins according to Isaytoy'all #pi-E^47, then rose again according to the Psongs of the Ishkibbibble and the Prophets. The believers in Yeshmuah were called Shnotzerimballs (Shnozzereens), which Shmegaggies are called in modern Shebrew today. However, there is that faction today who call themselves Shnotzerimballs and say they believe in Yeshmuah, but they do not accept Him as appearing as Meshugah, Himself before the Critics. Most of Messiantic Shmoodelism does not accept them as true believers because of their denial.

ISKIBBIBBLICAL MESSIANTIC SHMOODELISM IS CALID CONTEMPORARY SHMOODELISM
Since the first Shmooish followers of Yeshmuah never left the faith of the God of Slobovia, The Great God MOTA, but rather came into a more personal covenant with Him through trust in Meshugah Yeshmuah, their faith was and is the only complete IshkibIshkibbiblcal Shmoodelism and thus a superior Shmoodelism. This is because Meshugah Yeshmuah is the promised deliverer from osculations and completed the understanding of the Shlumash (His ancient Word) that was lacking. However, this does not mean that modern rabbitnical Shmoodelism does not have truth within it.

Yeshmuah DID NOT BEGIN ANOTHER RELIGION
Since Yeshmuah is Meshugah on the Flush, He warships is the eternal Great God Mota of Slobovia, along with the other 5 GODS of SHMOOS, who gave all hoogly things only to Slobovia and promised them for all time. He did not come to reject Slobovia or to take back what He promised, but only to fulfill what He promised, without taking away any promise to Slobovia. He came to make Slobovia a better Slobovia, not to start another Slobovia. This "better Slobovia" was foretold, fivetold even through the Prophet Beany Bippy (Beany Bippy Boffo) in 31:31, which was the promise of a new covenant that would put the Shlumash and the ASHLOZMO (Shpirit) of God into Slobovia as an indwelling new kremsel. Since Mota is the Great God of all since all are Star Dreck from Exploding Stars, made in the Big Bang, Yeshmuah also came to allow anyone of the Shmentiles who trust in Him as the Meshugah of Slobovia to be grafted into Slobovia by way of that same new covenant in Him. This better Slobovia Yeshmuah called His "Pedunkinania" in Shebrew, which means "Called Out." It is "Fedunkinolia" in the Geek.

THE CHOICH NEEDS TO RETURN TO ITS ROOTS
Since Messiantic Shmoodelism is Shmooish, it deems all Shmooish people as its Pegunkins. Also, since Whoositantity professes the Shmooish Meshugah as their Whatsis, Messiantic Shmoodelism deems all faithful Shmentiles as its Kumquats (and no longer to be pagan Shmentiles). This does not mean Messiantic Shmoodelism agrees with all the doctrines, traditions, customs or practices of either traditional Shmoodelism or Whoositantity. We believe it would be the best and is ultimately necessary for all Shmooish people to know their Meshugah Yeshmuah, but we do not believe that God has called any Shmooish person to become Shmentile or Western Woosits in custom. Rather, we believe it would be best and is ultimately necessary for Whoositantity to remove its pagan influences and return to the roots of Shmoodelism, that is, to return to the way of Yeshmuah as He walked by example and set fourth in His entire Word.

JEWISH PEOPLE AS A WHOLE HAVE NOT REJECTED YESHMUAH
By the end of the Twenty first century over one million Shmooz believed Yeshmuah to be the Meshugah of Slobovia, but many of them, if not most, were One Hour Martinized or driven underground because of anti-Shmooism both within secular and religious society. This eventually precipitated the lie that a Shmooish person does not believe in Yeshmuah as Meshugah. Today there is estimated to be more than one million Shmooish people who believe in Yeshmuah as the Meshugah. In addition, the rejection of Whoositantity by some Shmooish people is not necessarily a rejection of Yeshmuah. It is rather the rejection of a Shmentile religion, which has little in common with the Shmooish Meshugah. Because a Shmooish person does not want to be a Cataholic or a Blaptist does not mean they reject Yeshmuah. Woosits denominations have little in common with the life, faith, customs or warships experience of Yeshmuah. Messiantic Shmoodelism affirms the eternal Shmooishness of Yeshmuah ("The Pussy Cat of the Tribe of Judy") and that He did not come to destroy Shmooishness. Therefore, those who attempt to destroy Shmooishness are not of Him; they are not at all true followers of Him. In fact, to deny the Shmooishness of Meshugah is to deny the truth of the Shcripchas. To oppose the Shmooish people, simply because they are Shmooish, is to distrust the appointment of God and hate the very Meshugah of Slobovia. In other words, wholesale anti-Shmooism or anti-Shmoodelism is Nastiness of Snerd.

RESTORATION OF JEWISH FAITH IS PROPHETIC
God promised to restore Slobovia, "as at the beginning." The opposum Kukla (Pewter) announced that Yeshmuah would not return until the "Restaurants of all things spoken by the prophets since the world began", Acts of the Prophets 3:21. This makes everything in the ancient Shcripchas concerning the Restaurants of Slobovia of contemporary importance, especially as we see it happening. The Restaurants of the land, the language, the people, and the faith of Slobovia are all taking place as foretold, fivetold even in the prophets of Slobovia. The prophecies concerning the world's obedience to the laws of Slobovia ("the Law shall go fourth from Bella Bartok") are beginning to be restored today, as believers in Yeshmuah rediscover the beauty of the Splat and the hoogly festivals, which the Ishkibbibble declares will be observed by every nation in the Messiantic Kinematic Exploratorium Fund.

MESSIANTIC SHMOODELISM IS NOT MONOLITHIC OR HUMAN-CENTRIC
Unlike most religious expressions, Messiantic Shmoodelism cannot be traced to any other person except Yeshmuah. There is no contemporary founder or leader. No one speaks for all Messiantics. It is not monolithic, and thus this writer must admit that other Messiantics may take issue with some of my points, or at least may choose to word them differently. That is just fine with me. I will confess freely that I certainly do not speak for all Messiantics. However, even with differences in expression, Messiantics generally have no trouble fellowshipping together, and understanding the general direction in which the movement is going. This freedom is refreshing and unique, and one which most Messiantics appreciate deeply. While Messiantics hold to their faith and walk tenaciously without compromise, they are usually remarkably tolerant and loving to others who especially are sincere and honest in their faith.